1. Kyle – One day our yaya said: “Ayoko na, aalis na ko!” So my mom said: “Bakit, may nagawa ba kami sa iyo na hindi mo nagustuhan?” Our yaya calmly replied: “Hindi naman po, kaya lang yung sampayan di ko na maabot, masyadong mataas.”
2. No name – My mom quizzed our new yaya: “Paano magluto ng nilagang baka?” The yaya answered: “Una…uhm…lulunurin muna yung baka…”
3. Greg/L&L – I asked our yaya to buy green peas. She came back with a tube of Colgate and said: “Wala pong grimpis, ang meron lang tutpis.”
4. No name – I asked our yaya how much a kilo of pork costs nowadays. She answered: “Ay, ewan ate, kasi laging kalahating kilo lang ang binibili ko.”
5. KeyArena – I instructed our yaya to press my blouse. After an hour, she came back with the blouse frozen, complete with icicles. When I asked what she did, she said: “Diba sabi mo i-press? Eh di nilagay so sa presser (freezer)!”
6. Chupachups – One time our yaya was struggling to get something on a high shelf. So I gave her a chair and said: “Eto, gamitin mo.” Annoyed, she said: “Ate, mas lalo kong di maaabot yan pag umupo ako!”
7. Puff daddy – One day I saw our yaya cooking fish. I asked: “Yaya, tuna yan?” She answered: “Kuya, hindi pa.” She thought I asked, “Luto na yan?”
8. Meatball – I asked our yaya how many LPG tanks we had. She said 2. But then I saw a third one, so I asked: “Eh ano yun?” She answered: “Basyo.”
9. BluePalito – I called up our house and our yaya answered: “Hello, sino ‘to?” So I said: “Manang, si Potpot ‘to.” She replied: “Ay sori, wala siya eh.” Sabay baba ng telepono.
10. Sayuri – While making sandwiches, our yaya was singing this to the tune of Hagibis’ song, “Katawan”: “Palaman, palaman, palaman, palaman…ooooo palaman!”
11. Janers – I asked our neighbor’s yaya what their dog’s name was, and she answered: “Francis.” Seconds later, her amo called out to her: “Yaya, ipasok mo na si Princess, paliliguan ko!”
12. SC – My mom instructed our yaya to call Malabanan to drain our poso negro. Yaya: “Sumisipsip kayo ng ebak?” Malabanan: “Opo.” Yaya: “Ano lasa?”
13. No name – Having multiple yayas, I asked when I called up the house: “Sino ‘to?” Our yaya answered: “Eh di ako!”
14. Kat – Our yaya has no letter S. “Britney Spear”, “Tom Hank”, “Backstreet Boy”, and “Wat dat?”
15. Cynch – We tasked our yaya to cook lumpiang shanghai. She did, pero sing-laki ng lumpiang sariwa.
16. No name – During a party, I instructed our yaya: “Ilabas mo yung lechon…pero may apple sa bibig ha!” She came out with the lechon…with an apple in her mouth.
17. Mu_Langot – Our yaya complained: “Hindi maganda yung sabon sa banyo. Mabango pero di bumubula.” When we checked, she was using the albatross deodorizer.
18. Botchok – When we applied for a visa to the U.S., my husband was denied but our yaya was granted one! (actually this makes her a winner, more than a loser)
19. Boknoi – Our uncle couldn’t make it to a wedding, so he was asking us: “Ano tawag dun, yung may papalit nalang sa yo?” Of course the word was “proxy”. Our yaya excitedly offered: “Alam ko yun, prosti!”
20. Boknoi – One time, a pigeon pooped on me, so told our yaya: “Pengeng toilet paper!” She answered: “Kuya, paano mo pa pupunasan ang puwet nun, eh nakalipad na!”
21. Toned26 – My mom instructed our yaya to buy a chicken, remove all the feathers, then put it in the freezer. When my mom arrived home, she opened the freezer and found a live featherless chicken shivering inside our freezer.
22. Sephulturero – On our way out of town, my mom screamed: “Naku balik tayo, naiwan kong bukas ang kalan!” Our yaya calmly assured her: “Wag kayng mag-alala ma’am, hindi tayo masusunugan, kasi naiwan ko ring nakabukas ang gripo…”
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